Vatican Solution

After reading of the furor about the Pope's statements regarding Islam being spread by violence, I really had to rethink my position about the demonic nature of the Church of Rome. Christians like me have always considered Catholics to be masquerading as angels of light, just like Lucifer and his horny demons. So that would make the Pope the Antichrist. But anyone who says that Islam is evil can't be all that bad.

But here's where my conflict lies -- what's wrong with spreading your faith by violence? Unless it's the wrong faith. But God commanded Joshua to literally snuff out whole tribes of pagans, including their snotty kids and cows and sheep. Then Jesus told His disciples to teach all the nations what He had taught them, and to make them disciples. Don't know about you, but if I'm asked by the Lord to make someone a Christian, I think that means whatever it takes, just do it. If you have to bomb their villages and then let God-fearing companies come in and profit by building nice new Christian homes with a church and a few gunshops and paintball ranges, then do it. Just like the Americans are doing in the Middle East right now.

So on second thought, I distance myself from any kind thoughts about the Pope or any other Catholic, even those who oppose abortion, pornography and Communism.

Here's my solution to this dual problem of Islam and Catholicism. I support a massive global Jihad against the Vatican. Muslim hordes should be flown by American planes into Italy and then be given huge amounts of ammo to wipe out all those faggot bishops and behead the Pope. But exactly one week after the Muslim world pronounces victory over Christianity, the God-fearing nations of the world should each release several nukes on the Vatican. I really don't care if half of Italy is wiped out in the process -- they're all Catholic gangsters anyway.

That solution will teach Catholics and Muslims everywhere that it's only Christians like me who are destined to rule the planet. I have no doubt that Muslims the world over will convert to true Christianity -- after all, they understand that religion is best spread by the sword or a nuke. And Catholics will resign themselves to going straight to hell where they will join their not-so-holy father.

Fight the good fight. And remember, my way is always right.