Public Relations

I received an email from Dan Brown thanking me for all the great publicity I've been giving his book and the movie.

Moron! Hell awaits your kind.

Some anonymous coward has also sent me an email to inform me that my pro-death penalty stance is fascist, hateful and un-Christian.

Rot in hell, pagan.

I'm keeping things short and bitter-sweet today as I have another protest to get to. I've organised a picket line outside the biggest Adult World in the world -- this time I'm not there to purchase a few items for research purposes. Today it's all hellfire and brimstone. And I'm ready for the tall, leggy blonde who manages the place. She attacked me with a giant vibrator during a protest a few years ago. I was quickly able to wrestle it from her and now keep it as a memento in my secret bunker, but I can't promise not to hurt her if she pulls another disgusting prank like that on God's messenger of damnation.

Fight the good fight. If you're thinking of sending me a note of slander, remember Dan Brown's fate and think again. And if you're the porn lady, you better have something bigger than a vibrator this time.